Allah states: “Those whom believe pay attention: Revere Allah & speak a Straight-Word.”.
(Noble-Qur’ān: Chpt.33, V.70)
Muhammad (Peace be upon them) stated: “Always speak Truth, even if it’s bitter (even if it rubs People the Wrong-Way).”.
(ibn-Hibbān, al-Bayhaqī)
I remember, Years ago, that a Woman I know once told me I’m going to have Women-Problems for the Rest of my Life. I was truly shocked, that anyone would dare say this about and/or to me. I asked them how/why they would say something like this. Their response was: “It’s because you treat every Woman like they’re special.”. Their Statement hit me harder than I’ve ever been struck via my Entire-Life. That-Statement of theirs left me stuck, lost, conflicted, confused, compromised, disillusioned, scared/afraid, etc.
I’m not usually at a Loss for Words…I was verbally-disarmed That-Day. I truly didn’t know how to respond to their Response. I felt as though I was defeated. And, it seemed like I was psycho-emotionally melting away as per their Statements. I’ve constantly/consistently been trying to introspect, concerning how/why I treat every Woman I’ve ever been with as though their “Special”.
I’ve formulated, over the Course of Several-Years the Probable-Reasons:
1. I always attempt to engage People via the Mindset/Mentality of being Muslim-1st. Meaning, that I always aim to treat People with Respect & Worst-Case Scenario to never disrespect them.
2. I’m a Big-Believer in being a Gentleman, when it comes to dealing with Women. Meaning, I’m not an Abuser or Tyrant as per any Relationships which I’ve ever had with any Woman.
3. I try my best to be a Considerate-Person. Meaning, I make a Deliberate-Effort to learn/know the Needs, Triggers, etc. of Another-Person & aim to facilitate Character/Behavior that’s suitable for them to be comfortable with.
4. I believe in being a Thoughtful-Person. Meaning, I analyze the Likes/Dislikes, Turn-Ons/Turn-Offs, etc. of a Person & attempt to ensure that I provide them with Joy & project them from Misery.
5. I’m always willing to accept People as they truly are. Meaning, I never attempt to mold anyone into the Person I want/expect them to be. Rather, I attempt to empower them to be the Best-Versions of themselves.
Over the Years, pondering constantly/consistently-I’ve concluded that it’s truly unfortunate that we’re in a World where as-Sihah/Authenticity isn’t as celebrated as it should be. And, this is becoming more commonplace by the Day.
as-Sihah is comprised of 3-Pillars
1. al-Asl/Principle:
Doing the Right-Thing, even if one doesn’t have to.
2. al-`Izzah/Integrity:
Doing the Right-Thing, even if one doesn’t want to.
3. at-Taqwā/Morality:
Doing the Right-Thing, even if it’s against one’s Self.
All of us are beholdened to Authenticity, particularly/especially as per any/all of our Human-Relationships. And, we know this because Muhammad (Peace be upon them) stated: “Character will weigh heaviest upon the Scales (via the Day-Of-Standing).”.
(an-Nawawī)
So…referring to the Shock to my Soul, because of what was said to me: I’ve definitely had more than enough Time to decipher what I heard/listened to. It was actually quite necessary, for me to witness what was uttered. This is because it’s very important for me to know what Others think/feel about me. Also, it’s equally essential that I observe how I show-up in the World & how Others receive me, receive my Presence, receive my Character/Behavior, etc.
Gareth Bryant
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